It's been raining in southern California—not sure if the storm that tapered off then ended this afternoon was the sixth, seventh, or another this calendar year. I didn't need an online resource to figure out confident combines Latin words con=with and fi=faith, trust, belief. I didn't need to think hard to realize i trust my abilities because God gave them to me and provided opportunities and experiences that developed them well. I don't need to think long or tall to remember my confidence the sun will shine again.
It's been eons longer than a day since I've seen myself around town. Am I confident I'll see myself again? No. Not at all. Sometimes my body reels with grief as I sit at the computer working on a client design. Often I get up, go out, take a walk, distract myself any way I can.
I'll be waiting right here for myself until the day I'm home. Back in Previous City, the first time I heard Phillip Phillips' "though this wave is stringing us alone, just know you're not alone 'cause I'm going to make this place your home" moved me to want to search for home again. It was at a Blue Christmas service, and then the song kept playing everywhere I went. I can't make my own home. Will anyone anywhere make a home for me ever again? Waves stringing me along? These waves are triple overheads! I know the sun will shine again, but I have no confidence I'll ever be home again.